Narcissus

Slather yourself with the self-love to keep the opinion of others from hurting you. Constructive criticism will no longer feel like an attack when you allow your flaws to be seen in the light.

The myth of Narcissus arises from ancient Greece and tells the tale of an astoundingly handsome man who falls in love with himself. Narcissus was renowned for his beauty, born from a river god named Cephissu and a nymph called Liriope. It was prophesied to Liriope that her son would reach old age only if he never recognized himself. A hunter from the ancient Greek city Thespiae, Narcissus rejected all the romantic advances with which he was inundated. One day, he was wistfully staring at his reflection and became besotted with what he saw. Becoming so obsessed with his image, Narcissus lived out the rest of his days right there by the river, never taking his eyes off himself.

Narcissus’ Message

Pride has a rightful place in your life. However, a shadow side exists, too. The thought of making self-love a priority can be intimidating because it can be correlated with narcissism. The two are very different.

Narcissism presents itself as grandiose self-importance but can be derived from a lack of self-esteem and self-love. Narcissism demands adoration and validation, overcompensating for a lack of inner assuredness and confidence. One does not feel enough as is, so they draw in confirmation for showy importance. They cannot see beyond themselves.

Self-love is bridging the gap; self-love is radically accepting oneself as is. It is accepting the seemingly most unlovable parts of oneself. It is having confidence that does not seek out energy from others. When you have the self-love to ensure your needs and boundaries are met, you can see beyond just yourself. Self-love is having pride, while narcissism is remaining prideful, the shadow side of pride.

Remaining in the shadow side of pride can keep you from cultivating and maintaining close connections with others. Arrogance in excess keeps you from taking accountability. It prevents the ability to have tough conversations that require apologies from you, openness, kindness and understanding. Superiority is seen in black and white and doesn’t allow people to mess up, including oneself. It is easier to keep a blind eye to your own mistakes and to see only the failings in others without seeing their humanity and the nuance that most situations have.

When other people exhibit conceitful qualities, do your best not to take it personally, and remember, inside of them is an inner child that doesn’t feel safe and doesn’t feel enough without the ‘show’. If you can see prideful qualities within yourself, prioritize radical self-love and self-acceptance. Once you learn to be your own best friend in a nurturing, loving and supportive manner, it is safe to see your flaws without hatred.

Accept yourself wholly and be assertive in who you are as is. Healthy self-love will become your solace. You will create so much inner security that you will no longer feel shaken when you receive constructive criticism or an extension of an offer of deep communication. Instead of feeling unsupported, victimized and betrayed, you will have such inner calm that you don’t feel as unsafe from the actions of others.